Recently, a close friend of mine, about the only person who knows me personally AND reads my blog told me- 'Beatnik, why have you filled your blog with shallow posts? Trying to be funny when you're not, making a fuss out of the most insignificant issues and in general wasting time on meaningless ramblings? Why don't you ever talk about the current issues or something more deep maybe?' To which I told him that I'm like a fish in the ocean. You don't go telling a fish that it's showing off its swimming skills or 'making a fuss out of nothing' while hiding under the nearest coral rock to save itself from predators or wasting time making bubbles while it's actually breathing. Simply put, I told him- 'Go screw yourself and don't ever read my blog again.' Or something to that effect.
Although, when he was gone, I did some introspection and realized that..well... you know.. he might be a wee bit correct in saying all those things. I wasn't exactly the joke-cracker in a group anywhere, ever. Everytime I was asked to tell a joke, I would start off with the 4 elephants story. Wanna hear it? Well, there were 4 elephants who were climbing up a pole.. no wait.. there were 4 elephants walking down the road when one decided to climb a pole. The others also decided to climb. Some shit like that. I can't really recall. Who cares now that it's out in the open that I'm nowhere close to being funny. Anyway, let me desperately try and talk about some sensitive issue today, other wise my blog will seriously NEVER have anything meaningful to be remembered for(AND my friend will be proven right which I certainly don't want to see happening).So well, here I made a list of the few current topics that seem to be everyone's favorites for dissecting(which I wouldn't normally touch with a barge pole). Let me get my scalpel too.
1) Slumdog Millionaire: Muhahaha. You knew that was coming, didn't you? Even before the movie was released in India , Rehman had won the Golden Globe and the world was rolling at Danny Boyle's feet. Praises galore were being showered from the rest of the world, and loads of brickbats from India. You all know the controversy. Anyway, I'd almost made up my mind not to watch it, thinking, oh what the hell, I don't need another topic to shake an already shaken up poor moi's brain. But obviously, I went and watched the first day 3rd show of the movie, and at the risk of drawing brickbats myself for saying this- I did not understand what was so great about it. Nope, apart from the child actors and Rehman's music, I seriously couldn't find one amazingly different, living-upto-Oscar-hype material in the movie. In fact, try developing a temporary 3 hour amnesia when you watch this one(if haven't already), forget all about the Oscar hype, forget who directed it, and then watch it from a neutral perspective, like say, when you went to watch Chandni chowk to china(before reading the reviews) and then let me know if the movie still impressed you all that much. It's so Indian Film-type(substituting for Bollywood to avoid Mr. Bacchan's wrath) that I don't understand WHAT is so outstanding about it. Leaving aside the kids' performances, the others weren't even that great. The climax, so Hindi-filmy. I mean, I've already seen it all in the past 24 years of my movie-watching experience. Salaam Bombay, Bombay and even Satya were different and laudable. But this one, I don't know dude.
But know what's funnny? All those controversies surrounding this movie. I mean, if you ever happened to read Rediff's reviews(there were 2) and the discussions that followed in the public forums there, you'd be more amused than amazed. What Amitabh Bacchan said, what the world is saying, what the 2 foreigners sitting in the cafe somewhere were dicussing when the Indian who overheard their comments decided to blog about it, whether or not Shahrukh Khan's presence at the Gloden Globe was at all required, should we, Indians, be proud of the movie or ashamed of it, should people call it 'Bollywood's recognition by the west' or not.. man oh man.. the list goes on. But in all honesty, I'm glad that 'Slumdog' happened- for Rehman. Whether or not he wins an Oscar is not something I'm bothered about. He's done us all proud a hell lot of times already and I'm as proud of him right now as I was of myself after winning my first trophy in LKG. Yeah, that I'm comparing him to me- speaks for my love and respect for him. Go Rehman!!
2) Sanjay Dutt's latest comment- I can't quote him verbatim cuz I really didn't bother about what he'd said, but decided to write about this one for it makes a very interesting topic to dissect. He'd said something like 'after marriage, a girl should take on the husband's surname instead of sticking to her maiden surname, as a mark of respect for the husband. I'd be offended if Manyata had chosen to keep her father's surname.' My first reaction after I read this was,
'Yawn.' before I decided to move on to the next article. But since I'm talking about sensitive topics today, I might as well quickly form some opinion and write some bull here in order to appear smarter, more prudent and more aware than I actually am. So well, according to me, what Dutt said is totally crap.
You know what I really think should be done? Once a woman gets married, she should get an altogether NEW surname. A surname she always dreamt of getting after marriage. Like in my case, I want a powerful surname, something like a Birla, or an Oberoi, or even Ambani.. a surname that has a deep clink to it, you know. But anyway, if you can't do that, rather do what else you want to AND can manage right? Wanna stick to your father's surname, do that. Take on your husband's- feel free to. Or maybe hyphenate both- couldn't be more attractive. Like Aishwarya Rai-Bacchan. Personally, I'd go surnameless. Beatnik. Nothing's gonna sound kewler.
3) Patriotism:- Since today is our Republic Day, and since of late I've been feeling immensely and over-whelmingly patriotic, I thought I might as well dedicate a few lines to my beloved country. Funny how at times you need an external influence to make you realize that you DO in fact, still care about your country, and feel deeply about small small stuff when it comes to that. Let me tell you a recent incident. A month or so back, I went to this play. Now, since quite a while, the movie halls at my city(I'm hoping it happens everywhere else too) air the National Anthem, requiring you to stand up and show your respect to the country. Since the anthem is already being sung on screen, people usually choose to remain mum and close their eyes or just hum along. Only a few souls do actually SING it. You're free to if you want though, it's just that people(including me), don't sing out loud. Since I'd never seen that happening at a play, I was pleasantly surprised when we were all asked to stand up, and sing the anthem there. Yes, there was no recorded anthem and so the 100+ people in the audi actually sang it. Sounds like such an insignificant thing right? It didn't feel insignificant at all. I hadn't 'sung' the anthem out loud like that in over 8 years, and I'm sure most of people in the audi would also have decades of non-singing to report. I was actually smiling all throughout while singing the anthem, and once it was over, I looked around to watch people's reactions- everyone seemed so damn ecstatic to have gotten to actually sing it like we did way back in school. I love my country a lot.
A very Happy Republic Day to my fellow Indians!
That's about it. I can assure you I'm not talking about any more 'meaningful' topics again till next year. It's really, really taxing. Now, back to work on my 'how to cross a road' post on which I've been trying to work for so long..
